A Case Of The Vagues

We want you to send cold emails that warm your leads and get a response. To help you craft great emails, we’re sharing what NOT to do with practical examples as we rip cold emails a new one. Because really, no one should have to suffer through an email like this ever again.


Cold Email Critique #1

Not only does opening with a fake apology feel like a mom-guilt tactic to get your guard down – I have no idea what this person is
actually trying to sell me. This overly-worded email makes me work too hard to read it.


Your contacts probably have tens if not hundreds of emails coming in. Don’t make them struggle to know what you’re saying. State your message clearly in 125 words or (preferably) less. 


Cold Email Critique #2 


What specific outcome is being promised here? What specific pain point of mine is being addressed? (…Yes, those are crickets.) Prospects don’t care about the general wellbeing you want to promise. They usually don’t even care about the bells and whistles of your service. They care about you delivering easy solutions to their problems.

Be clear. A practical way to tackle that is to build each cold email template off of one specific benefit, not a slush bucket of your features. 


Cold Email Critique #3

This email could be sent to any person, who works at any company, anywhere. The promise of “business success” here is painfully generic. 

Even if this email somehow got into the hands of the right person, what could they connect to in this message? Untargeted emails like this are annoying to receive and are likely to get flagged as spam. For your campaign success, for your domain health, don’t do this. Build strategically targeted lists around one buyer identity and write emails specifically to that persona.


Let us know if you’d like to read more cold email critiques! You can even nominate a cold email to get iced by sending it to rachel (at) avadel (dot) agency.